GLITTER DUST OF MY MIND. SOLILOQUY.
As I laid myself in bed, putting David and Zofia to sleep, I thought about how the kids have grown. It felt so good to just close my eyes and feel them right next to me, hearing their breathing. It felt so great to be alive, to be breathing and felt so at peace having my babies. Not realizing, my happiness caused me tears and I didn't wipe them. The kind of tears you just let roll down your face and just enjoy the sweet feeling of joy. Oh Tears! Why do you just come rolling down my cheeks without even me realizing?
TEARS. It reminded me of the conversation with David the other day. Whenever Zofia and David are playing around and sometimes when they end up teasing each other, Zofia ends up crying. Then Zofia will tell me what David has said and has done that made her hurt. She is the more vocal and open about her emotions and all else, compared to David, he is the more secretive and not too open about telling what he feels. I spoke to David just by himself and asked him why does he keep teasing Zofia. He was staring at me and tears just started to well down his eyes. I was not even in an angry tone nor being intimidating, I just asked him calmly. Then he started crying and not telling me. I told him sometimes it is alright to cry, though sometimes you have to be strong not to cry so you can express what you want to say and not choke on whatever you wish to say. Mommy: David, mommy is not scolding you, Mommy is not angry. I am supposed to be your best friend because I am your Mommy & you can tell me everything, I will understand and I will be the best person to explain things because I am your Mommy. David: I cry, because I am hurt and I don't like it when you get upset with me. Me: That is why it is important to discuss, talk openly and you tell me your side. You don't have to cry, it will wound your heart. Mommy is strong and doesn't cry, have you ever seen me cry? (I felt confident saying that) David: Yes I saw you cry, I remember that day you were crying in bed, while someone I couldn't remember was screaming, scolding you & hurting you. I remember you were crying and when I remember it, I cry cause I get scared you will cry again. I was surprised and wasn't expecting that answer from him. He was 4 years old then, he is 8 now. But memories like such matters a lot to our children that's why we have to be cautious we correct these bad memories in their minds. Me: David, have you seen Mommy cry again since then? That was in the past and we all have to forget that. I do not even remember it nor think about it, that is why it has to remain in the past. We have bad memories in life, but it is a choice what we keep and what we remove from memory. Mommy is happy and won't cry again, because Mommy's heart is healed. From now on, you have to promise me to let go of that bad memory and live to be happy. I promise you I will not let something like that happen to us again. Kissed him on the forehead and he smiled. Beauty in everything. Today I had this interview for the IT department in a school in Singapore, It's called Singapore Polytechnic.
Just as soon as I arrived, I started to feel really good, the environment just feels so good. It feels good to see young people, some playing soccer, some playing basketball, some just sitting there and talking to their friends, laughing, tables, cafeteria, nature. It's beautiful, it takes me back to memories of my school. We should have been more thankful that we were able to go to good schools, colleges and universities. I could only hear stories of lots and lots of people that needed to work to support themselves to school. I am humbled and I am blessed that my parents did everything for me. It makes me more thankful and appreciative of education knowing it is in exchange to hardwork and sacrifices. The best we could do is to study hard and do our best, study to excel not just to pass, doing our best to exceed expectations, not just delivering what is required. If I could speak to the younger generation, I would tell them to take care of their education as well as to be thankful, be grateful that they could study. As much as you could, experience life while in school, make good friends, befriend your teachers, join clubs but don't neglect academics, indulge in sports and be happy! One day, when you are older, one day when you age like me, you will look back and smile at the best things life has offered while we were in school. My eyes are welling up in tears as I wrote it down. I always look back at highschool and it was super fun! The best years in Highschool. Elementary and preschool years was fun! Start of college was super fun, until I met someone who influenced me a lot and made me & my college life a nightmare. Like I always tell myself, Do not awaken love when it is not the right time, love when not taken cared very well could ruin you too. By and by, I am trying to recall sweet memories of youthfulness while in college. I choose to remember the good happy days, which I think was only the first year and then the rest of the years before I became a Christian, was a complete havoc. I never try to avoid writing about it. My college memories ended up limited, like if it was in a movie, you only have the start; happy, great friends, dorm mates, great grades and then the rest, became trash and worthless piece of information, waste of film. I had to witness things from the life of another person that I could not even think I could speak of as he became drowned by drugs, alcoholism, weed, cigarettes, selling drugs, fraternities, heavy pornography. To the extreme that his friends come by and they do drugs while watching porn, he would ask me to stay in bathroom, pass me a book to read and stay there for hours until he and his friends are done. I watched him and his friends prepare, setup, burn crystal meth in a foil and sniff it all to satisfy their soul. He was just crazy about it, too dependent, he wouldn't even sleep, he just play his guitar the whole night and wouldn't even realize his fingers are bleeding. As a non drug user, memories will always stay in my head, which such information, I was too young to even understand, my mind is too young to comprehend their need for drugs and alcohol. It still gives me the creeps when I see those now in the movies, it feels like dementors trying to run after you. All I know, is I had to get myself out of the situation before I lose my own self and soul to mental illness. I found God and God picked me up from that mess, God picked me up in 2001 and left everything from there. Now back to where I am today, I sat by the cafeteria outside the school where kids are reading, listening to music. I sat and cried my heart out, I prayed these kids heart will be protected, to love their education and not put it to waste. I prayed for them to respect their parents hard earned Money, as they worked hard to send them to school. I left the school, my heart is lighter, there is always HOPE. We start with the people close to us, influence the younger generation, start with your own family, brothers, sisters, cousins. Let the young generation learn from us. Never too late. A day before Christmas. We are starting to feel it. Then boom! A beautiful memory!
When I was younger and living in Jakarta Indonesia with my Mom & Dad, we used to watch MTV Asia. We have these VJs on tv and I have always wished I was one of them and I wished I'll go to Robinson Road. Then one day, Dad decided to send me, Mom and my sister on a vacation to Singapore 1998. We explored the city, went to find and met Mike KASEM of MTV Asia. In the end, we did meet him as well as Shaquille ONeal who happened to be in an interview. Today, I just passed by Robinson Road and I shook my head remembering how my Parents support what I like to do. When I wanted to see a Hanson concert, Dad sent us, waited at the parking lot while Mom Me and my younger sister watched at HardRock Cafe screaming our hearts out for MMnmbop HANSON. Mom had to elbow rub with teenagers just for me. Yet the Most memorable yet crazy is when we watched The Boyzone concert, it was too packed and I was with my mom pushing thru the crowds. I fainted because I was too small and my mom asked the guards to take me to the backstage, away from the crowds. While I was there, Boyzone came over by the medic area to see me and check if I was okay. I just saw Shane and Ronan face to face! I had to thank Mom for the strategy Hahahha She is crazy, all for me. How I am right now is a product of my parents hard work, diligence, guidance and influence. My dad is a great Man, my BOSS, the true Leader I look up to, a Man full of compassion for people and always teaching me Humility. Dad is my favorite VIP, The CEO of his own company and the CEO of our household. He always teaches about in whatever achievement or in whatever attained, feet should be on the ground. LOVE for others, respect, patience and understanding. On the other hand, My mom is a wonderful mix of a housewife and a businesswoman. Fun loving, fashionable, classy, elegant. She is a beautiful woman I always admired. She raised us all 6 kids, though we all grew up with maids and nannies but Mom has always been the hands-on Mother. Mom is a source of inspiration that I can get what I want when you wish for what you want. And the best thing I learned from my Mom is to love Dad every second of the day that she could. I just couldn't explain how they set the standard of staying inlove with each other after 37years together, kissing always, hugging and taking care of each other like lovers. My point is, we as parents, how we are and how we perceive life in general, has a very huge impact on our children's lives. It is also our responsibility to show them as they were growing up how to deal with life when they will be on their own, because our parents are our best examples. It is true for my case, in whatever I do, in whichever decision I make, I always make sure it is in accordance to my parents or I have their approval. I am not young anymore and I have my own decision making, but my parents has a say to it, not because I am dependent on them, but because that is how much I love them, they always know what's best for me. Today I would like to say THANK YOU for parents who set great examples to their children. We will do the same. Love your Mom And Dad on Christmas! Mwah! I cried my heart to God as I was in pain from a heartache that I struggle with. I cried and called out to God and He answered me. OBEY. Do not be ANGRY, not HATE anybody. All the more I cried, it is so hard Lord, so hard to love not hate people who hurt you. But God corrected me, "I showed you myself as an example. I never taught you to be racist nor for you to judge them because they judge you and racist towards you. I showed you love and mercy. They do not know me, so they do not do what I say. You know me that's why you know my voice and you OBEY ME."
Am I not just talking to myself? Is it just my own voice telling me what to do? Is it you LORD? And I heard. "MY SHEEP HEAR MY VOICE, AND I KNOW THEM, THEY KNOW MY VOICE, and THEY FOLLOW ME. I am the TRUE NORTH. OBEY." And it reminded me of the verse - John 10:27 I cried over and over battling with my own self. "God, I am so hurt! So Hurt my heart even cries." And He replied "I know so well you are hurt, but even in the past, you have been hurt too, yet have I NOT HEALED YOU? Have I not been FAITHFUL to you all these years? Remember that I healed you of all your pains you don't even remember any of it. Why wouldn't you trust me again on this one? OBEY." And I was silent for a long time and now I find myself writing it down so I will remember everything. Everything's starts and ends with the Lord. He is the Alpha and the Omega. To start off, I am not writing a review for a psycho horror film, nor writing an adventure story about "My Precious"- The RING article, I will write about The Ring you wear that symbolizes a lot. The most often question from every person I know asks me since I got married is : What's the Difference now that you tied the knot? To be very honest, everything has changed since I got married. Here are a few areas I could think of that has been impacted by the change : 1 Love - Even before we got married, I always had been filled with so much love for him as my partner. I always think of what is best for him, what makes him happy, what he deserves. Sometimes, I fail to recognize my own happiness, always selfless, for the love of the other. I realized he has been doing that too for my sake and always think of what makes me happy. Now that we are married, we always discuss the real definition of Marriage - ONENESS. We learned to communicate openly of what makes me happy, what makes him happy and we share the happiness. It's as simple as making each other smile, with the little things and the most basic of things. We are always happy every possible time we are together and always excited to see each other smile. 2 Acceptance - We admit we are completely two different individuals. We admit we have a whole lot of differences plus we are born from very different worlds. We were raised differently, educated differently, grew up differently, think differently, perceive things differently and so much culture difference we never could imagine. Before we were married, the differences always trigger misunderstandings and fights. Now that we are married, I have come to complete acceptance that I married such a wonderful person, completely unique and special on his own. He will continually improve to be the best that he wants himself to be, the improvement in each of us will never stop, but I have loved him for everything that he is before I have become part of his life and how we will become in the future. We don't change our partner to suit our demands cause once you change them to how you want them to be, they become not the same person you fell INLOVE with in the first place. Enjoy each other's uniqueness, work together on each other's strengths, labor in love together on each other's weaknesses. You are ONE. 3 Commitment - I have always read a lot of things about couples growing old together, their secret to staying together is that when there is anything broken and anything that needs working on, you don't throw things away but of course try all your best to fix it. Seeing old people walking down streets holding hands despite being 80 years old and frail, doesn't stop them from showing love and care for each other. In the past, my view of things were different. If it doesn't work, I'll do all that I can to save and fix it. Still if it doesn't work, I'll try all means until I exhaust everything possible. In the end, if I get too tired, I just let it go cause I always have this feeling I am better on my own than be entangled in such a mess. I used to be fault finding too, wants perfection and I expect a lot which if it doesn't get met, I get frustrated. Marriage has changed my view on things and when we exchanged our vows, it was very meaningful to me; In sickness and in health, for richer or for poorer, till death do you part. There is no point hurting your husband, it is the same as hurting yourself. Remember, you are ONE. Don't be the first person to ever question your own decision of choosing the person you married. The line "Why did I ever marry you!" during arguments and "I wished I didn't marry you!" must be avoided. Stick to your COMMITMENT With Love, Acceptance and Commitment, only one of the few things in my life that has grown in capacity. Most importantly, I have learned the real meaning of my wedding ring. Whenever you are hurt, upset, angry at their past, or disappointed at things between you and your partner, look at your wedding ring. Imagine that day you vowed to each other when you said, "Wear this ring, as a sign of my LOVE" You chose that person to love and commit to that person for the rest of your life, You chose to love them and co-labor with them for the lifetime you have committed. Your ring will remind you that you love the person so much you married them. You love the person so much that you said
"I DO." So if all else fails, Stare at your RING, Yes, your PRECIOUS RING, know its true significance, its value & understand things until it all comes back to you why you got Married in the first place. Today, is the first day after my birthday. As August 31 hit, 12am, I looked at my phone and smiled. God is loving, sweet, wonderful and awesome. He gave me another year completed again and it was a great year. I closed my eyes and said a prayer thanking God of everything in my life and for all the memories from the day I started to have a memory :) Hahahha! Does that makes sense?
If you close your eyes right now and rewind your whole life like a movie, what is the very first scene? Try that now. Rewind as far as you could and remember as hard as you can, digging to the oldest memory you have stored. Then freeze on that memory. Let me share mine. I probably was 2years old and a half. Mommy brought me to school for the first time. I was introduced to the class as Tata Honey (Little Girl Honey). Very small, short hair Dora style, I had bangs on my forehead like it was chopped up silly! By the way, it was called "Bangs" back then, now they called "Fringes". Long time ago when playgroup didn't exist and your mom is most excited for you to start school, I was mixed with kids older than me. Some of them were 4yrs old and some 5yrs old. I always remember overhearing this line whenever the other moms see me; "oh this is your kid? She don't look very much like you! Probably looks more like the dad!" And hearing that all the time at a very young age that I wasn't beautiful cause I always thought that my Mom was the most beautiful girl in the world. In my head, if I don't look like Mom and I look more like Dad, when back then Dad was all beard and mafia tough guy, wow, I must look like a boy! Too early for identity crisis! Whenever they have an activity, I remember I get excused, either I had fallen asleep in the class or I'm too busy writing on the classroom walls instead of my paper. And then my classmates call me "the flower", just let her be, let her do her stuff.Which later I found out, this is because you can join the games and play but you don't count! And so I remember my young heartache as a 3year old when it was school recognition. Mommy dressed me up in a beautiful white dress with a Princess crown on my head. At the recognition day, I watched my classmates go up the stage and it looked like some graduation to me. I waited and waited for my name to be called. As I kept waiting and hoping, I wasn't called and I asked Mommy why. She explained that my classmates will go to the next level because they were older by age. I remember I cried, I was heartbroken cause they will all leave and I'll lose playmates. Then I remember my teacher, her name was Belen. She gave me a ribbon and placed it on my chest. She said it will be okay, the good side of it is that, I will have new playmates every year! And I was happy again :) What about you? What's your earliest memory? Would you share it? I have a beautiful realization today and it's too selfish not to share it. I want EVERY WOMAN I know and EVERY MOM I know to read this. Today, I was about to leave for a meeting. Women know this, that there are times we don't regard ourselves highly.Sometimes we don't feel beautiful, we don't feel at our best. Before I left home, My little Girl wanted to have a photo with me and after the photo taking, she told me "Mommy, I love you! You are my most beautiful girl! You are my Barbie!" I heard it and said thank you but it didn't sink in. I looked at the photos when I left and I saw her smile. Only then I realized. Sometimes we do not know how what's beautiful because we think of what's not beautiful. It came to me that in the eyes of our children, they look up at us, believed so much in us, they dream and hope so much in us; how could we value that so little? I am so beautiful in her eyes because she LOVES ME! Yes, the same way why my MOMMY is the most beautiful girl in this world in my eyes too, yours too! Ladies, Mommies, Never look down at yourself, your capabilities, your talents, your skills, your gifts, because even if you don't believe in yourself at times, People who LOVES US do. Smile, you are BEAUTIFULLY & WONDERFULLY MADE! Politics was never my cup of tea, I always declare I serve because I serve for The Lord not for Man. But then on this last trip to attend a family wedding, it opened my eyes to a new realization. Our blood has always been in politics from grandparents, uncles, aunts, cousins. My father is not, that is why me and my brothers weren't inclined nor on that path yet. Dad is a strong man, but he would leave politics to his brothers. I am like my Father, I would like to serve people in other means but not thru political medium. But lately, I started feeling "The VARGAS" blood in me. This last trip to join my cousins wedding just explained to me what the real meaning of politics is. My uncle just inspired me in so many different ways. For my cousins wedding, a lot of family and relatives travelled to another island. Uncle asked me to see everyone since our relatives stayed in one apartment. I met uncles, aunts, cousins to the farthest degree. They gladly hugged me and kisses me, not seeing me for a long time. It made me teary eyed, because these people remember you as a child and tell you stories about your Dad when he was young. They travelled almost 3days to get to Bacolod from Surigao, despite weather conditions. It's beautiful. Politics is not being in position. I saw how uncle treated each person like family, even by blood or not, they are family. I fully understand the Call to SERVE. Those who wants to exalt themselves will be humbled, those who humbles himself will be exalted. I understood the Real Heart of a Politician. I wouldn't say it's about money, power, influence, personal gain. Material things are like dust in this world, they get flown away by the wind. A real politician is the real servant to his people, he serves them because he loves them and wants the best for them in their lives. He gives what he is abundant of. He gives his life in service because he wants to provide not just for his own family, but to even extended. He could choose a life of relaxation and be on vacation, retire and life in the US, but he chooses to serve until he can. As I met those relatives I never even knew names, it lightened my heart. My heart loves each one. It made me understand why my parents always teach about THE CALL TO SERVE, that Your life is not about yourself, it is always about the people you love, helping other people, giving your heart for other people without any exchange in return. My heart smiles. I am proud of my roots. I woke up with the Sunday preaching still on my mind. "Your word is a lamp for my feet, a light to my path." Psalm119. If you imagine yourself holding a lamp and walking in the dark, the lamp lights your way yet the maximum it could reveal is the few steps you can take. All the rest is for you to put all your faith, trust and hope that you don't walk alone, He lights up your path. It was about taking one step at a time, co-laboring with God, taking faith day by day. As God lights our way, we take everything day by day and he reveals our way slowly as the our path gets lighted. God is faithful everyday, every minute, every second. We may be unfaithful and we may fail, but He is always faithful and He never fails. Yes, it could get dark sometimes and we have uncertainties, but one thing is certain, when You walk with God, He will never leave you nor forsake you. Good morning everyone! Beautiful day! It's a beautiful day filled with Love and Surprises! I woke up to a beautiful surprise this morning; to extremely sweet I LOVE YOU's, Pink & Yellow roses and sweets! Today is our 2nd year Anniversary as a couple, 730days and counting. I am thankful for the man who loves me for everything that I am; best and worst. I am thankful for the man who understands me during normal days or crazy times. I am thankful for all the patience as to dealing with me and the differences. I am thankful of his faithfulness in never missing a day to show me how much he loves me, how much he cares and telling me multiple times in a day that he loves me in all his most creative ways. For the flowers, the "I love you" balloon, the gifts and the brownies, most importantly, I am thankful for HIS LIFE, because God blessed me with him. I am extremely blessed. Happy Anniversary! Cheers to another year! Thanks for being my Man of FAITH, HOPE and LOVE!
Remember why you started. The new year has started! Every new year or every anniversary, every birthday, It gives me this excitement I always get for new beginnings. A fresh start! 2013 started really well for me. It started really beautiful. I have everything all written down in December 2012 of the year planning for January 2013, my projects lined up, goals, planning and tasks. To summarize, it is a blessed life, beautiful things, a life of abundance, shield of good health, wonderful family, good relationships, but of course it wasn't perfect. I had troubles down the road, yet as always, God is faithful. I am NOTHING WITHOUT HIM. I completed the year and my projects were completed. The YEAR 2013 was a Year of Pruning. I am waiting for what 2014 brings me. All the More, I will continue to live my life for the people I love and to glorify my Lord and my GOD with everything that I AM. Your Love Never FAILS, Never GIVES UP, Never RUNS out. Thanks for 2013, I am ready to SOAR with you in 2014! I had a dream about zombies. November 27, 1am. I dreamt that I was in a game of chase and we go for the prize. So we ran and there were zombies around me. Other zombies need to eat on the smaller zombies to get on the top and they get bigger and bigger as they take on the smaller ones. I continued to run without having to step on any of the small ones nor step on any remaining parts on the way. You have the choice to eat on them to make you bigger but for me, it was running for the prize that matters. I ran almost to the end and it was just me and the biggest zombie. He reached the end first and wasn't just happy with getting first place. I am on second but it didn't really bother me. The only thing though is that he is hungry for power. He did get on to the top but he wasn't happy with that, he started chasing me so he can eat me up. I started running towards the direction where I was from. I wouldn't want to finish this race anymore because that will mean I am serving myself to him as food. I ran until I went back to base. I waited there and all other small parts left behind are struggling to survive, they needed to eat something alive. I was left with no choice; to be eaten by the big strongest zombie on the top or be eaten by so many small ones at the bottom. In the end, the small ones starting eating my flesh as the big ones comes. In my head, I will be fine being eaten by the small ones that have the biggest monster eat me up whole. And I woke up screaming. The dream shows how the world had become so selfish that people eat people to get to the top, a dog-eat-dog world. Sad but true. I love you in the morning, I still love you at night,
I love you as the sun comes up, I still love you till the sky is graced by the moonlight. I love you cause you make my day bright, I love you cause you make my heart feel light. I love you cause you make everything feel perfect and right, I love you because in love there is no fright. I love you when I'm next to you, But most importantly, I love you the same intensity even out of sight. Pray without Ceasing. I love my country. I love my people. I love the Philippines. It hurts when you read people say too many negative things about the calamity. This is in relation to the recent calamity that hit my country, The Philippines. Other than giving our donations, help and service, please continue to pray. The damage caused is more than losing food, shelter, properties, lives. People who survived will never be the same again. Pray for more of comfort in the Spirit, continue hoping to live and not lose hope, to not lose faith. Reminds me of the Story of Job in the Bible, when he lost everything and people told him to deny The Lord, but instead, despite everything, He loved God more and held on to Him all the more and Trusted Him more. Pray continuously and pray without ceasing! I have known so many people and even I myself experienced several points in my life when I ask, "Why God? Why?!?" We question, we ask and we seek for a logical explanation or we expect for reasons to validate. Trusting God is one true test of FAITH. You put your TRUST in God that you reach to that point you stop asking that big WHY. To TRUST is to have FAITH, to have FAITH is to have no DOUBT, to have no DOUBT is to have no FEAR, to have no FEAR is to have LOVE. God is a God of LOVE and a GOD of PEACE. He will reveal things to us beyond our own understanding, His wisdom is far greater than ours that's why even the reason to understand WHY things happen, we even need to Let Go." My heart aches as I am about to face a reality when I get home. My sister in law is grieving a death, a death of a sister. When I first knew about it, I could not hear the exact words as it was spoken to me. I had to ask one more time to say it again just to make sure I heard it correct. Flashes of scenes from last night came to mind, we were having our life group meeting when she mentioned that her younger sister needs prayers because she is sick. It's hard to say something to console when honestly you yourself is feeling the exact emotion she is holding on to. I tried all my best to be a strong sister and give her encouragement , as well as all our other sisters tried to console her too and give her comfort. I had to ask again to make sure I heard it right. Yes, she passed away. I couldn't react for a moment. I didn't have the right words to say and all that I had in my mind, is "Why Lord, Why? We prayed for her, but there was not even enough time to pray for her and be healed, instead, she was taken away by death as fast as that?" Life has been taken and robbed. Everything just started coming to my head. I was at work, it is tough to react and cry when I have to face clients when you are in distress. I stayed as focused as possible. Then I called my dad to inform of the news. As I heard dads voice, it made me feel like a child again. I told dad everything and that it scared me. But my Dad, my comfort, reminded me why we must not fear death. There may be some times in our lives that we wonder how will it be losing the people we love. Just thinking about it breaks my heart and it makes it bleed. But this is part of life. Molded thru dust, God gave us His breath to live on earth. Then that day comes, our end claims the breath we borrowed from Him, ashes to ashes, dust to dust. What is Most important really is how we lived our lives while we had it and that you remained alive in the thoughts and hearts thru memories with the people left. We often hear people tell us how busy they are, how tied up their schedules are, how they have so less time. No time. No availability.
The fact is, your time and my time is the same. You and me get 24hours in the same day. You and me and the President get the same 24hrs in a day, yet the number of days more in life, that is a mystery. Just like today you have the 24hrs to use, you might not know if you get additional 24hours for tomorrow. In most cases, the time we spend in a day is very intentional. We decide to whom we give our time. We decide which meetings and appointments at work that we accept and approve. We make choices as well and sometimes we even get options. Your availability is a reflection of your priorities and your commitment. For me, my time is one of the most important gifts I can give to someone, because time I can't buy when it runs out. I used to play a lot of computer games in the past and every gamer would know how important it is to buy time to continue life. It is always about finding the right strategy. I used to buy so many life potion and buy for reserve purposes. When the game is over, you can restart over. But real life is not the same. When you are dead, you are dead. Time is very important and whom or what we give our time to is where are treasure is. When we love someone, we always find availability despite how busy one is. This explains why some people have a lot of time set for God and devotion. Some have a lot of time set for work and career. Some has a lot of time set for family, loved ones, their husband or their wife, boyfriend or girlfriend. Some has set so much time for their friends and activities. Keep in mind, your time allocation and availability determines your level of commitment. Availability is a decision you have already set in your mind. It is a matter of the heart. It is a decision you make even before anything comes and you never compromise because it is a priority. That is why when it concerns your main priorities, we always say, "I will make myself available." If you make time for someone and they can't make time for you, then it is their priorities and commitment that needs to be set. Find time for the ones you love, you might not have all the chances. "Choosing a wife is choosing a Life. That is why you need to carefully choose the Wife that is meant for you. Don't run around chasing women that you don't intend to honor nor you don't even think of possibilities that you will have them as your lifelong partner, with the thought of being with them for the rest of your life and not just for your experience purposes. Do not awaken love when not meant. Choose carefully the woman you intend to marry, setting your mind and heart that she is your treasure and God's given blessing. For the man who gains a wife of good values and wisdom, gains favor, both in the eyes of man and in God.
For those with wives, hold them close, protect, love and honor. Wives are the lamp to light our paths and guides to alignment." - Emily09132013 I asked my Uncle to draw a scene for me. Mary Kissing the Feet of Jesus. And here is His interpretation. Galaxy Note2 "Ink" Sketches.Thank you for taking the time. It is a beautiful gift, I will have this printed and framed. Thank you very much. Here is message with the drawing : There are 3 prominent Mary's in the Bible. Mary the Mother of Jesus, Mary the sister of Lazarus and Mary Magdalene, the one forgiven from her sins and served Jesus until his death. She was at the cross with Mary the Mother of Jesus. The one in the photo could be any of the 3. Mary the Mother of Jesus cried at Jesus feet when He was crucified in the cross. All of us could identify to that, as a mother and as a woman. Mary Magdalene cried at the feet of Jesus as the Woman who was close to Jesus and His disciples. I could relate to all of the characters; as a confessed sinner and cried in humility for forgiveness. Last not least, which is my favorite, Mary of Bethany, the sister of Martha and Lazarus. The woman who loves Jesus with all her heart and committed to serve her. The one who chose to be at peace and stay at the Lord's feet. She anointed His feet with the best perfume, kissed His feet and wiped it with her hair and her tears. She is the woman who loves to serve the Lord with all her heart, mind and soul. In this present world dictated by the standards of the physical, to be beautiful has been defined to be physically perfect. To be beautiful, women get a lot of pressure from television, magazines, movies of the Perfect Beauty. Looking good is very important as all women would agree, it builds your confidence. Yet for me, there is one most important thing that makes a woman genuinely beautiful, Beauty in the Spirit.
I want to be a woman beautiful in Spirit, of whom my presence will make people happy. I want to be a woman filled with the Spirit that I may always speak in wisdom. I want to be the kind of woman that I am beautiful without makeup, because my radiance and my glow is from inside-out. I want to be the woman whom other women can confide to and rely to when they need comfort in the spirit. I want to be a woman whom other women are inspired to live their life day by day, in Love, in Faith and in Hope. Being beautiful in spirit, more than skin deep is the most beautiful foundation, nothing compared to BB Creams or any most branded foundations that we all use. If Loving God is your foundation inside, what could break you? Nothing! Because your true confidence is in Him! Proverbs 31:10 "A capable, intelligent, and virtuous woman—who is he who can find her? She is far more precious than jewels and her value is far above rubies or pearls." Start cultivating your spirit. Smile and stay beautiful! Like the sun, you bring light to my life.
Like it's rays, it brings brightness to everything around me. Like it's glow, it illuminates all the beautiful colors in my life. Like it's glory, it creates rainbows in my heart. Like it's presence, it highlights everything beautiful. Like it's grace and grandeur, it brings pure joy I would like to soak day by day for the rest of my life. We are spirits by ourselves, spirits who belongs in a body, with a sound mind and a soul. We currently live in the physical body, the mind and soul to function. But then if we want to seek God and be in synch with God, we have to live in the spirit. I can't neglect the physical body as much as would want to and abandon it. God created man and breathed thru his nostrils, He gave him life and spirit but He needed the body. Living in the spirit, definitely is not one easy task because everything around us that we live in are physical. Everyone around us operates in the physical. You believe in something yet the world doesn't even believe it. You see things that are beyond what others see yet the world is blinded. You hold on to ideals that you fight for righteousness yet the world thinks you are giving yourself a hard time. Then it dawned upon me, I had been doing my best to live and understand in the spiritual just as God is, But there are just times, my spirit gets crushed when I realize the fact that the world is all functional based on mind - what one thinks, based on body - what one feels, based on soul - what one wants. And He said; "I never said it will be easy, I only said it will be worth it." Definitely not easy. Living in the spiritual means what God wants and not what I think, not what I feel and not what I want. It is not about what I want. It is not about what I feel. It is not about what I think. It is about Gods will and I have to say this repeatedly to my stubborn self at all times just for it to sink in. Selflessness at all times. Complete Surrender! - Emily, July20,2013 “22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.” Galatians 5:22-23 (NIV) What is fear? Fear, I would define as the Anxiety of the unknown. Fear is something that starts from Inside of you. Fear is lack of faith. I can say every fear I have is caused by two things. It is either losing something I already have or not getting something that I want which boils down to lack of faith and selfishness. Because of fear, you acquire worry. Worry is a form of fear, that is fearing what hasn't happened yet which is ridiculous. It is like, "I worry about what might happen tomorrow because I fear it won't go the way I want." If I am asked if fear can be eliminated, yes I would say it is possible.That would take an amazing relationship with God. Identify your faults so you can become aware of them.Right every wrong you ever did, pray and meditate everyday and do the next right thing. You also need to Help gods children. "There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear." Since Love is the strongest emotion, If you are full of love, then there is no room for fear. Just like it's impossible to have faith and have fear at the same time. Eric Anderson, June27,2013 John 21:15 Jesus asks Peter, "Do you love me?" Peter said proudly He loved Jesus 'MORE THAN ANYTHING' in this world. Jesus asked 3 times and Peter said He loves him so much with so much conviction. At the time Jesus was captured and in trial, people who saw Peter asked him if he knows Jesus. Strongly he denies, he said he doesn't know Jesus. He did this 3 times, he was asked 3 different times. When asked if he is Jesus disciple, He denied it and said, “I am not!” Matt 26:75 Then Peter remembered the word Jesus had spoken: "Before the rooster crows, you will disown me three times." And he went outside and wept bitterly. Who would have thought a man like Peter, Jesus disciple, a man who was with Jesus physically could get to a point of denying Jesus 3 times? When He was with Jesus, he confessed his LOVE but he was weakened when it required his faithfulness at the time they were not physically together, he denies his relationship with him. Out of fear for judgement from society, the FEAR of not being accepted, our own selfish desires within ourselves, we sometimes deny LOVE and FAITH. And Because we lack of faith, we become cowards to fight for the TRUTH and for the people we say we won't betray. For we all have sinned and fallen short of the Glory of God. Thru God's Grace, even if we always fall short, HE still FORGIVES. He always Forgives because He is GOD! This is why HE IS GOD! If once in your life you were Peters' situation, realign and ask forgiveness. And if you happened to be Jesus's side of whom hurt, denied, betrayed, we shall forgive and forgive like without judgement. Never easy right? That's where His GRACE comes! The sin starts when you entertain the thought of concealing the smallest of truth. When you start lying, you will never be upfront about intentions because you know you have hidden agenda. Do not Conceal anything in the dark, reveal all in the light, that everything is exposed, where the way of sin in broad daylight is not tolerated. Be wary of sin. Be cautious of the seeds of sin. It could be littlest of things. Big or small, it is still sin. Like making up alibis to get away from something. Some people make it an excuse that they lie and hide the truth to protect the people they love. Somehow it becomes a scapegoat for people to rationalize their behavior that they do it for love, for concern, for the sake of other person. But reality is, it's for their own ego and selfishness, depriving others to the truth that they deserve to know. Love the light and live in the light because once always in the light, you have high sensitivity to any small threat of darkness or dimness. "Everyone who does evil hates the light, and will not come into the light for fear that their deeds will be exposed. But whoever lives by the truth comes into the light, so that it may be seen plainly that what they have done has been done in the sight of God." John 3:20-21 NIV |
AUTHOR
And now these three remain: FAITH HOPE LOVE. But the greatest of these is LOVE. I LOVE to write, about LIFE, LOVE, PEOPLE, EXPERIENCE, day to day life and INSIGHS. I love to Travel. I write about experience, culture, highlights and knowledge. May this site serve you well. I will be open for comments and suggestions, as well as topics I could write about. Thank you very much. Enjoy! |